Day Pet Peeves of mine (humor…really)

Dont kill the ponys

Dont kill the ponys (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

OK so we have already established the fact that I am normally not an irritable person…or have we.
At any rate, there are still things that irritate me (which I guess makes me an irritable person). Nevertheless, it amazes me how people can walk through life and not realize what they do to other people via their actions and their habits (or lack thereof). Therefore, I have decided to compile, yet another list of Pet Peeves. This one is about every day stuff. (btw, I dont know exactly what the above photo has to do with this blog….but dont kill the ponys….dont do it!)

1. Chewing Gum….REALLY LOUD!
I love it when people chew gum and the whole world knows they are doing it by their melodic composition of harmonious smacks and saliva precession. In other words, KEEP YOUR MOUTH CLOSED when you decide to chew gum anywhere near my proximity. Just saying.

2. Phone on Speaker.
Dont worry. I know that you are talking to someone else, just by the fact that you have a phone to your ear. I dont need further proof of the existence of another person on the other side of that phone by the evidence of their loud, speaker sounding voice. In fact, it is preferred that such evidence be withheld from my acknowledgement.

3. walking on the side walk with friends and hogging the whole side walk so I have to walk on the grass.
I see them walking towards me, all three of them, chatting away about something obviously interesting. So interesting in fact,that even though I am walking towards them, they seem not to see me. And thus fail, to allow me to get through. Forcing me thus to have to walk on the grass, just because your conversation was SO important that you could not spare to let one of your friends step back a bit and let another person through. Cuz, as we all know, its not about anyone else but you. Solution? Next time I walk towards you, im going to charge through the very middle of your group, and keep walking. Yes, I think this is what Jesus would do.

Beaten horse, I know. But I cant help to notice the delight people have these days to show off their rear end, or their private clothing. Is it really necessary to enlighten my understanding of the garments you wear underneath your pants? Last time I checked, under-wears were, well, gross. People normally DONT want to see them, let alone touch them. In fact, I know some people who might not even wear them. SO WHY AM I SUBJECT TO SEE YOURS. Just saying….really…I dont want to see them.

I was stopped at a red light the other day, and I saw this gentleman running across the street. It was actually pretty funny, because with every two strides he would pull up his pants (which where obviously, over sized). So now im thinking, as if showing everyone your rear end is not enough, now some frontal exposure is necessary as well. Solution? Belts. Or rope…which ever is more fashionable

6. Pitbulls?
Yup. Major pet peeve. reason? It has become a fashion to own one of these great yet dangerous dogs. Dangerous because most people train them to be so. Therefore, I dont want to see your pitbull running around my neighborhood without a leash. Dog training you say? nah, I think we need owner training instead. (PS. Pitbulls are amazing dogs that with the right owner can become a marvelous companion.  Consider adopting one.)

7. Excessive crotch scratching.
Yes we all know you have one. We dont need more evidence of the fact that you have a crotch. Furthermore, we dont need outward expression of the fact that your croth itches. ESPECIALLY WHEN I AM 2 FEET AWAY FROM YOU. Solution? Preparation H. They sell it at your local pharmacy, over the counter. Or VAGisil. Just saying.

8. Cancerous lungs
This one I have to explain a bit. It has been proven that second hand smoke produces cancer. so, knowing this, Why are there people still smoking near me. “if you dont like it, then move” they say. Really, is your death producing habit sooo good that is worth lighting up next to me and making me move just for you? It must be. Kuddos to you who are considerate and smoke away from people.

9. Questions?
I have been standing in line now for about 15 minutes. (cashier is slow). when I finally get to the front, out of NOWHERE comes this…person…who happens to “just have a quick question” about a price of an item. A question which turns into a 5 minute monologue about how dumb the store is for displaying prices in such fashion and how disturbed this person is over the lack of proper marketing….REALLY! If you are going to have the galls to as a “quick question” then ask your “quick question” and MOVE! Dont hog, steal, take 5 minutes of MY TIME to inquire about YOUR lack of marketing comprehension. Solution? Dont ask questions….EVER!!!

10. People who dont ask questions
We were assigned a group project in one of my classes ( a long long time ago). Everyone was told what to do. The next week everyone came in with what they needed to do. Everyone except this one gentleman. When asked why he didnt bring the right assignment (which means the rest of the group now has to do it). He said, “I did not know what to do”…..Solution? ASK QUESTIONS…ALWAYS!

As you know, this list is by no means exhaustive. There are many many things that are pet peeves for me…thank God im not president, lol. Nevertheless, if everyone avoids these pet peeves, the world will be a much better place to live in…………(i guess I should be president then). PS.  Please understand this is all in jest……but if you do any of these things…well……did I mention that I’m running for president?

Juan Castillo Jr.


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